Are you tired of that belt around your waist? Don’t you think that it’s about time you get promoted, even though you’re putting minimal effort into training and skipping class whenever you feel like it?
Well, have no worries. You can get promoted even though you don’t deserve to. You just have to kiss your instructor’s a**!
Here are 6 ways how to do it.
1) PAY THEM A COMPLIMENT
Whenever you roll or see yet another opportunity to do so, pay your instructor a compliment. It can be about their technique, their transitions, or even how soft their Gi is. „Wow, what detergent do you use? It smells so flowery“, that’s another one you could use.
Maybe even compliment them about their hairstyle, how ripped they’ve become from all those kettlebell swings.
To kiss your instructor’s a**, you’ve got to be creative. You’ve got to go with the flow. Be water, my friend. Or whatever.
2) VOLUNTEER – AGGRESSIVELY – AT ALL TIMES
You know that moment when your instructor chooses someone to show techniques on? That should be you! You should be the person on whom they’ll demonstrate setups.
Therefore, it’s vital that you volunteer to be that person. Insist on it, aggressively if you have to. There’s nothing your instructor likes more than an overzealous, pushy student.
3) ALWAYS LAUGH AT THEIR JOKES
Sure, your instructor may not be the funniest guy in the room. His jokes may lack any humor whatsoever. But you know what? If you want to kiss their a**, you should be laughing. Every single time they say something that’s supposed to be even remotely funny.
„Hahahaha, that’s so funny!“ Repeat that sentence over and over again. Go to sleep with it and wake up with it. You’re going to fare well if you do so.
4) BUY THEM COOKIES
You know what your instructor likes? Cookies. And other gifts. So, why in the world aren’t you gifting them those delicious chocolate-chip cookies? You’re missing on some big time promotions, fellow Jiujiteiro. Get them cookies or/and other gifts and give it to them after class.
With every bite they take, you’ll feel a new stripe forming on your belt.
5) TELL OTHER STUDENTS HOW AWESOME THEY ARE
Word of mouth is a great tool in marketing. And you need to market yourself if you want that belt promotion. So, to kiss your instructor’s a**, you need to tell other students how amazing he/she is!
Emphasize their teaching qualities and technique. Tell your fellow training partners how much the instructor cares for them. How great he is and how there’s no greater man/woman out there.
This will do two things. First, it will make the other students realize just how great their instructor truly is. And second, they’ll tell the instructor all about the compliments you’ve been giving him.
Sounds like a fantastic combination, doesn’t it?
6) KISS THEIR A** BY WASHING THEIR GI
Do you know what’s the single worst thing about training Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu? No, it’s not the escapes, the defense, nor is it the takedowns that you suck at doing. Instead, it’s washing your Gi. And then getting it out of the washer, drying it. And then folding it and getting it ready for your next training session.
Hmmm… You know what? Your instructor has to do these things too. So, offer to do it for them. Each time they’re done with training, get their Gi, wash it at your place, and bring it back to them the next time.
Just don’t wash their belt. They’ll lose their technique and their coaching skills if you do. Just let it dry.